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The 12 Blogs of Christmas: Three. Skyrim Follies.
Thanks, everyone, for the kind response to the last two blogs. We already have many entries for the game, but we're looking for many more. If you're new here, check back to the first Blog of Christmas for the chance to win some great prizes.
Before anything else, nothing to do with anything, as found by Alan J. Porter, it's... Skate Bush!
From here: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS ABOUT SKYRIM! PROBABLY NOT ABOUT THE BIG PLOT REVEALS, BUT LOTS AND LOTS OF SMALLER STUFF! IF YOU WANT TO BE SURPRISED BY EVERYTHING IN THE GAME... YOU... SHOULD...NOT... PASS!!!!
From here: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS ABOUT SKYRIM! PROBABLY NOT ABOUT THE BIG PLOT REVEALS, BUT LOTS AND LOTS OF SMALLER STUFF! IF YOU WANT TO BE SURPRISED BY EVERYTHING IN THE GAME... YOU... SHOULD...NOT... PASS!!!!
Ahem. So, as we speak, I'm suffering from one of the many ailments caused by the latest game in the Elder Scrolls series. Not Skyrim Shoulder (dead at an awkward angle on the sofa), Skyrim Bladder (hanging on is good for self-discipline, though, right?) or Skyrim-sightedness (what do those tiny letters in the transitions say about Daedra?), but a Skyrim hangover, caused by staying up several hours past my bedtime, because I wanted to keep playing with my Wabbajack.
I knew I was going to get addicted, because, like almost everyone else who plays this sort of game, I've been addicted to every previous version. The days, weeks, months of play and return play value that Bethesda pump into these games, especially compared to everything else on the market, these are values that actually move me. They give the customer astonishing value for money, at a time when that's a rarity. We're actually a two-Skyrim household, Caroline having (rather guiltily) also bought it for her PC.
Skyrim isn't just for the sort of gamer who marches along like the Terminator, trying to slam through the game in the most efficient way, taking the quickest path to the greatest power. Although the game might be perfectly enjoyable that way, there's also lots for gamers of my ilk who like to read the books (so much back story, so much silliness, like Nightingales: Fact or Fiction?), make jewelry ('I've been going around the courts selling my home-made necklaces' isn't something you could say of most XBox games), cook the meals (taffy treat, anyone?). It could be said there's more to life than playing adventure games (yeah, we know), but there's more to life than that in this game. The sheer beauty of walking in the north at night, when the aurora is active, tends to distract one from the real possibility that at any moment one might be gutted by a Snow Bear.
The size and complexity of the world presented are such that, in my experience at least, elements bleed into my experience of the real world. We've all, I'm sure, walked past a bush on a real world street and had the reflexive part of our brains consider harvesting that. Or even seen a small figure in the distance getting onto a bus and thought: sneak attack for double damage. But Skyrim's reality is deep enough that, after long periods of play, I find I need to go outside and have my senses deal with the deeper complexity of nature. (It's said that we find nature so relaxing not because it's simple, but because all those minute fractals and colour differences are actually very complicated.) I'd call that condition Planck Length Level Pixel Starvation (the new album by The Fall). That wouldn't happen if I'd been playing Pong. It's because Skyrim reality, while still nowhere near the complexity of real reality, is getting close enough to start engaging the parts of our brains and nervous systems that keep looking for the detail of those realities. Chocolate doesn't make you miss cheese, low calorie cheese substitute does. It's obvious now that, sometime in the future, we'll be playing in worlds indistinguishable from reality (we may all be just NPCs in one of those right now). But I tell you what, for the created realities on the way to that level of tech, the ones that get close but not quite... those developers had better hire some neuro-psychologists, or the 'undetailed valley' might claim a few victims.
I'm interested in the fact that this depth creates emotional reactions in the player. I'd left my housecarl, Lydia (what a Home Counties name for a Nordic warrior maiden that is, 'they say her name in hushed tones, for it is... Lydia') in my house in Whiterun, because I find having companions along distracting, and, well, I don't like to risk getting them killed. Only, in Lydia's case... sorry, it's still pretty raw... I decided that a particular Bandit was being so annoying, with his shrugging off lightning and poison and familiars and everything, that I decided to let Lydia loose on him. And that worked out fine. Except then we ran into this bunch of Foresworn (with their very well constructed deer-based society and annoyingly powerful combat spells), and she ended up dead with a frost spike through her head. To be more precise, I saw her die, and then felt that, since I didn't want to lose her (as a resource, I was that cold in that second), I should get killed quickly myself, then reload the game. So I rushed at my enemies, and after a hectic fight, actually managed to beat them. But only just. And so then, as I staggered around with my blood thumping in my ears, I had to make a rather terrible moral choice. Should I quit without saving, and go back to when Lydia was alive, and have the two of us potentially have to make many, many more attempts to kill these guys? Or should I save now and let her die? Initially, I decided to leave it to fate, and, having healed myself, wandered off. But where's a Snow Bear when you need one? I wandered for a long time, and found myself forced to make that choice. I... I don't want to talk about it any more. I did what I had to do, okay? I'm joking, but I did feel genuine emotion at the time. If one can feel such hesitation about the many-iterated life of a simple bunch of pixels with a face on it, there's probably hope for how human beings treat each other.
It must be said, also, that Skyrim reality has exactly the same perceptible level of written-in ethics as real reality does. That is, none. (Well, I might argue that, actually, but let's take none as the value for this article.) Fiction tends towards karmic payback, the idea that bad deeds rebound on the character. In real life, that tends to depend on people, on societies, rather than anything written into the hardware. (But again, where that difference lies... that's a whole other blog.) Older Elder Scrolls games elected to have a player character that did bad things become shunned by those around them, finding it harder to get what they needed from others. I rather liked that, because that social level of ethical hardwiring rings true. But, in the wake of in-game airport massacres and the like in other titles, Skyrim lets you do what you will, with no in-game consequences. A couple of the quests ask you if you want to do terrible things. And, indeed, in both situations I've encountered, they're squalid enough to make me think the developers are trying for a real world level of ethical interaction with players. 'If you do this,' they seem to be saying, 'no, you won't get caught, there won't be consequences, but still... it's pretty ugly, isn't it?' At my local comic shop (the wonderful Axion Comics in Chesham), I was asked the other day 'in Skyrim, do you play a good or evil character?' That shows the developers got it right, I think, that in a game without an alignment system, players find themselves asking that question. Because only the smallest children engage with the world on a risk and reward basis. Most adults have several extra layers of moral indices atop that, and can decide whether or not to kill a nasty (but not abusive) orphanage manager because a runaway asked them to. (In the case of that quest, I'm looking for a number for Skyrim Social Services, leading to a negative report on the orphanage in question and a promotion for her assistant. Just because none of these things can be easily achieved with an Orcish Bow of Thunderbolts is no excuse not to try.) Myself, I don't steal in the game, and I try not to kill people who aren't trying to kill me. (Except those Foresworn scum.) I didn't even search Lydia's corpse. I stood in front of a Mammoth the other day as it seemed to consider me for a while. I put away my bow. I wondered if I'd get the option to talk to it, or perhaps smooth its fur. It threw me so far into the air it was like I was skydiving.
Props must also be given to Bethseda for a splendidly diverse game world. Women offhandedly fulfill every job men do. There are a plurality of human races. (And actually, the matter of racism and the political fallout from it forms one of the main threads of the plot.) It shouldn't always be the case that thanks be offered for what will, one hopes, one day be the norm in all media, but I think we're still at the stage where applause for progress in this direction is a good idea.
I'm delighted that there are such charming oddities in the game. Why are the books you can learn skills from so cheap, when they're very rare, usually guarded by monsters, and being trained by people costs so much more? I think a specialist bookseller should open in Solitude and send players to find collectible volumes. I look at those Couriers and think 'how did you get past all those Snow Bears in just a loincloth?' It's dangerous but somehow charming that the master of the Bard College keeps a lighted torch with him at all times, inside the building, and also in bed. I think (popular internet meme) 'getting an arrow in the knee' is so widespread among Guards that it can only be a euphemism for syphilis. And why are so many Daedra apparently from Glasgow?
Top Ten Skyrim Band Names (to be said in a John Peel accent):
1: Empty Goat.
2: Iron Arrow.
3: Ruined Book.
4: Pickpocket Giant.
5: Ring of Glibness.
6: Concentrated Poison.
7: Left Hand Mine.
8: Deathbell.
9: River Betty.
10: Slaughterfish.
And let me take a moment to include this from Joseph Crowley...
'On the twelfth day of Skyrim, my dovahkin gave to me -
Twelve dragons raging,
Eleven thieves a-thieving,
Ten Jarls a-jumping,
Nine wights a-wighting,
Eight Stormcloaks fighting,
Seven witches shrieking,
Six wolf Companions,
Fiiiiiiive Fu Ro Dahs!
Four Greybeard mages,
Three wounded knees,
Two stray dogs,
And a Dragonborn to slay the whole lot!'
Twelve dragons raging,
Eleven thieves a-thieving,
Ten Jarls a-jumping,
Nine wights a-wighting,
Eight Stormcloaks fighting,
Seven witches shrieking,
Six wolf Companions,
Fiiiiiiive Fu Ro Dahs!
Four Greybeard mages,
Three wounded knees,
Two stray dogs,
And a Dragonborn to slay the whole lot!'
Thanks for that festive offering, Joseph.
I love that there are baskets (which look too much like searchable urns, mind you, because how many times have I picked one up in error?) and carrots (whatever sort of foul beast is inhabiting that cave, they always bring along a sack of carrots, and they stay fresh for at least 250 years) and ruined books (what nobody seems to have is a dustbin). These things aren't there for their tiny monetary value, because, wonderfully, there are value systems in play other than money. They're there to be meaningless. I get lost, oh, do I get lost, I was disarmed down a mine once, and spent about a day trying to find that bow. The awkwardness of crossing a mountain, or actually, in my case, often, finding said mountain, makes the finishing of a quest so much more like fiction, so much more epic. The awkward and meaningless details of a world help to make it a world.
The range of what the player can do in Skyrim, added to all those tiny features, means that combinations of factors lead to genuine weirdness. Being able to put buckets over the heads of characters so they won't see you stealing their stuff isn't a flaw, it's a feature. (As the developers realised, and let it stand.) I hope we get to the point where they take the buckets off and ask why the hell you just did that, and where's their candlestick gone?
The range of what the player can do in Skyrim, added to all those tiny features, means that combinations of factors lead to genuine weirdness. Being able to put buckets over the heads of characters so they won't see you stealing their stuff isn't a flaw, it's a feature. (As the developers realised, and let it stand.) I hope we get to the point where they take the buckets off and ask why the hell you just did that, and where's their candlestick gone?
So, a while back, I asked on the blog for your mad adventures in Skyrim. (I, for example, have been attacked by a fleeing Goat with an ice spar through its head and no other option.) Here's a sample of the responses...
David Bradley, editor of SFX Magazine: 'I intended to craft the perfect stealthy archer. A wood elf (or Bosmer, as we call ourselves), nimble and swift, I imagined myself the Legolas of the Skyrim world. I grabbed a bow and quiver and accepted the blessing of the Thief Stone without hesitation. I would be a phantom! Silent death from the shadows! Tamriel's equivalent of a ninja! Alas, the first lesson I learnt about myself (other than that I will happily put anything in my mouth - butterfly wings, lavender, spider's eggs, giant's toe, raw dog meat) is that I prefer to hit things really hard. With a bloody big hammer. My attempt at subtlety lasted all of two minutes. Creeping around in the dark with an arrow notched? Pfft. Moments inside Bleak Falls Barrow, I discovered that this elf prefers to run at things with a two-handed blunt instrument. Pelting headlong at a bandit with warhammer raised has become my default tactic, even after the momentum of one particularly reckless power charge took me clean through an opponent and off the mountain edge the other side, requiring a reload and a more sensible approach vector. Skyrim has exposed me as essentially a big baby, with an oral curiosity and a desire to impatiently batter things. I'm not proud. But I am having fun. Smash! Eat. I recently got married, acquired a dog, and took to distributing flyers outside the temple of Mara. Seriously, I did that for an entire evening.'
Tony Lee: 'I've not had a chance to play Skyrim all that much of late, so when I do, it's a treat. And I'm still new enough to the game to find myself enthralled by some of the graphics. For example, while walking along the frozen wastes, I found myself walking beside a fox. Now, I like foxes, I've adopted one at the British Wildlife Centre, and I was suitably impressed at how lifelike this fox was as he walked through the snow and then paused, as if watching something in the distance.In fact I was so caught up with the fox, I neglected to notice the Ice Troll that he was watching until it smashed my spleen up through my spine...'
Tony Lee: 'I've not had a chance to play Skyrim all that much of late, so when I do, it's a treat. And I'm still new enough to the game to find myself enthralled by some of the graphics. For example, while walking along the frozen wastes, I found myself walking beside a fox. Now, I like foxes, I've adopted one at the British Wildlife Centre, and I was suitably impressed at how lifelike this fox was as he walked through the snow and then paused, as if watching something in the distance.In fact I was so caught up with the fox, I neglected to notice the Ice Troll that he was watching until it smashed my spleen up through my spine...'
Simon Kavanagh: In Morrowind, I’d cast down Dagoth Ur and broken him on the slopes of Red Mountain. In Oblivion I shattered the Daedric Lord Mehrunes Dagon (well, I didn’t – Sean Bean turned into a dragon, as you do, and bit his head off – but I, er, ran around. A lot). So – walked into Skyrim full of cocky confidence and, after scaling a mountain, gazed upon the world with a wild surmise. Then, four minutes into the game, I fell off the mountain. Quite a lot of damage. But, Lo! I had landed in a wondrous dell full of pots of Mammoth Cheese. So, to help my health, Reader, I ate all that Cheese. The controller started shaking quite a lot at that moment. Perhaps, I thought, it was the Cheese? No. It was a really quite giant Giant. Using all my Elder Skills I ran around a lot waiting for Sean Bean to save me. When this had failed I cast Level 1 ‘Sparky’ at Giant. And such was my power that the Giant almost recoiled, before smacking me with his club and sending me arcing several thousand generous feet over the mountain that I’d fallen off in the first place. Yes, he killed me. But I had his Cheese. I also saved Winterhold from an Ice Dragon with, if I may say, a quite spectacular fireball spell. And then the Guards, in their gratitude, attacked me. Reason? My 15 foot area o' damage spell had also killed ... a chicken. Oh, yes, like Dave I too distributed the pamphlets of love. Then I got an Amulet saying I was 'available', beat up a blacksmith, and he proposed. I used to go to a Club like that.'
@kendersrule 'I utilised Barbas as a free, indestructible companion for quite some time, the only drawback to this was his constant trying-to-walk-into-me. He pushed me into traps, made picking up items difficult, and, when I was on my way to Alduin's wall, pushed me off a cliff. Do Daedric pets always need so much attention? I was thoroughly tempted to choose the axe.'
Paul Stewart: 'I once closed a door on a dead draugr's head and it made the body twitch like mad. Havok physics is ace. I may also have chucked the occasional groin-aimed ice spike, kicked all the stuff off Belethor's coffee table repeatedly and shot a sneak arrow at a bandit that sent it spiralling over a balcony into the river.'
Jonathan N. Hord: '1. After completeing the mission to collect that Jagged Crown that the High King of Skyrim would wear, I decided "Why give this away?" My Character, Guy de Fleur-de-lis the Duke de Croissant, has dubbed himself High King of Skyrim and anyone who opposes has faced his blade. Now if only there were a way to kill the Jarls and replace them with my own. We all know Faendal would make a pretty badass Jarl or Whiterun.
2. Though I've tried many times I still can't succeed it diving off the peak of the Throat of the World and hitting the ground. I've hit and rolled almost all the way down but I'm still trying to find a way to launch myself off the peak of that mountain so that I can fly through Skyrim. If I had the Levitate power that was available in Morrowind, I would totally succeed. Still, it's fun to see just how far of a jump you can get from diving off the peak.
3. More Diving! Once you become Arch-Mage of the College of WInterhold you get access to the roof of the tallest tower, with quite the drop below. I like to place markers on the ground below and try and jump off and hit them. I've also been trying to coax a dragon to chase me over there so I have a bigger marker to aim for when I jump off. Plus, it is really pretty scenery as you're falling to your doom.'
2. Though I've tried many times I still can't succeed it diving off the peak of the Throat of the World and hitting the ground. I've hit and rolled almost all the way down but I'm still trying to find a way to launch myself off the peak of that mountain so that I can fly through Skyrim. If I had the Levitate power that was available in Morrowind, I would totally succeed. Still, it's fun to see just how far of a jump you can get from diving off the peak.
3. More Diving! Once you become Arch-Mage of the College of WInterhold you get access to the roof of the tallest tower, with quite the drop below. I like to place markers on the ground below and try and jump off and hit them. I've also been trying to coax a dragon to chase me over there so I have a bigger marker to aim for when I jump off. Plus, it is really pretty scenery as you're falling to your doom.'
Adam Doyle: 'I was working my way through the Blacksmithing tree, and to celebrate reaching level 100 I took mercenaries one by one to the highest point I could and threw them off using the Unrelenting Force shout.'
Andrew Trowbridge: 'Sent on a mission to somewhere in the far North, my companion and I stumbled across some ruins with three frighteningly huge spider-things lurking outside. They jumped on my chum and rendered her unconscious in a matter of seconds. They then turned their eight-legged attention towards me and I, quite naturally, panicked. Running blindly backwards, I threw fire-based spells at them, but they shrugged off my efforts with ease. I stumbled off a cliff and thought I was definitely an ex-Khajiit... But to my surprise, I had fallen, quite by chance, into a camp of Imperial soldiers. The whole unit ran out of their tents and brought down the troublesome arachnids with a flurry of arrows. Then a huge war horse waded in and stamped on the spiders for good measure! All the troops quickly went back to their business without giving me a chance to say a heartfelt thank you. You just got the impression that they were muttering to themselves something along the lines of: "Bloody adventurers - that's the third one this morning...".'
Keir Liddle: 'On the Thieves' Guild mission to rob the Goldenglow estate with a shamefully low Sneak skill, it was causing me all sorts of grief, with many encounters ending in death at the hands of the mercenaries surrounding it. Then on one attempt what should descend from the skies but a Dragon, which proceeded to set fire to the mercenaries, slaying most of them, and also burn the beehives that meant my mission was completed rather more easily than it should have been. Then there was the priest of Mara in Dawnstar who fell through a mountain and ended up on the other side of the map. I tried to fast travel to the point where he emerged, but he simply continued on his way towards the tower he was leading me to. In the end I had to catch up to him and walk at a snail's pace over most of Skyim battling Bears, Sabre Cats, bandits, thieves and Frostbite Spiders along the way. Great for XP but it did leave me wondering why I hadn't saved closer to the start of the quest.'
Matt Morrison: 'After being informed that I had to speak with the Greybeards in their temple at High Hrotghgar at the top of the highest mountain in Skyrim, I left with all haste. Hey, if the guys have magic powers that let them shout across a whole land and be heard, I don't want to tick them off by pissing around after they've said they wanted to speak to me. Slowly, I made my way up the mountain, fighting trolls and giants as I navigated the treacherous northwestern face of the mountain. I managed to get within sight of the fabled temple, but was unable to climb any further, the clear snowy plain I saw heading up to the temple too steep to climb. I tried circling around to the south to find another pathway up, eventually finding myself over a small village. I dropped down, hoping to find a place to rest before attempting to climb again... only to find that I'd just landed in the back side of Riverwood - the town where my adventures began in the first place! Dejected, I went back to the Jarl of Whiterun to report my failure. It was then that I saw a conversation option I swear I didn't see before, which made the Jarl tell me about the 7000 step pilgrim trail on the OTHER side of the mountain... And so began the long and arduous journey... to the other side of the mountain! Here are the screen shots I took of the temple.... so close, yet so far away... and Riverwood from above...'
(It's like seeing lonely and beautiful images from the Voyager probe.)
(The poor thing.)
Jason Kerouac: 'I stumbled upon a quaint little house. The door was unlocked, so I walked in. There, I found a VERY unpleasant Necromancer who was VERY unhappy to see me. It took everything I had to fight him off, and I then – of course – looted the place. Barely recovered from the battle, I stepped outside to fast travel to the nearest town and sell off my ill-gotten goods. “ROAR!” Roar? A dragon, circling overhead… of course. I let fly with an arrow when suddenly I spot it, out the corner of my eye, a second dragon. Holy. Shit. How am I going to deal with this? I focus on the first dragon but it’s not going too well, when suddenly, he gets distracted. Circling overhead, he spies a bear and goes after it. But the other dragon is already engaging the bear. My target lets loose a shout and manages to catch his brethren in the crossfire. The two dragons fight it out and - much to my delight - the shots I’d taken were enough to give the second dragon the edge. With the first one down, and the bear out of the picture, it was now just me and a much-the-worse-for-wear second dragon. A shout and a volley of lightning ended this battle rather hastily, and two souls were mine for the taking. Let’s hear it for Dragon ADHD.'
Craig Blackwood: 'Having fought our way through hordes of Foresworn, myself, Aela, Delphine and Esbern arrived in the Sky Haven Temple. Making our way through the temple we came to a room with a tiled floor and a pillar at the end. Esbern informed us that these were pressure pads and were probably booby trapped, "Pressure pads, eh?" I thought to myself and drew my bow. I shot an arrow at one of the pads causing a fireball to shoot out of the pillar and burn against the floor, "Awesome!" I said and started shooting arrows at the floor causing flames to leap from the pillar. Occasionally one of the fireballs would dislodge an arrow an it would hit another pressure pad, sending more fire everywhere. After five minutes of being thoroughly entertained by the display of pyrotechnics, I decided to get on with the quest. There was a chain on the pillar to pull and disable the trap. I told everyone to wait behind me whilst I made a dash to a safe patch of ground a little way across the room. I sprinted and hit a pressure pad, no problem, I can take a fireball easy enough. The fireball hit me and sent one of my spent arrows onto another pressure pad, that fireball sent more of my arrows onto other pressure pads. The room simply exploded. My burning carcass was catapulted across the room, trailing flames as fire erupted all around. As my dead, charred body fell to the ground triggering yet more fireballs, Esbern remarked, "We'll wait until it's safe".'
Marina Richardson: 'Not long after arriving in Whiterun, Elena, being a stalwart sort and fond of slicing baddies to ribbons with her sword, decided to join the Companions. She immediately started crushing on Vilkas, of course. Then there was Ria... Elena returned to the Jorvasskr one evening to discover the body of Ria lying on the floor beside her bed. Ria's head and shoulders were sunken into the floor. There was no explanation for her death, no evidence of a crime... and what the heck was she doing sinking into the floor? After looting her dead friend's body, Elena picked up the corpse and placed it on the nearest bed, hoping to give the dead woman a sense of dignity. None of the other Companions seemed to notice Ria's death, until one day, Njada walked up to the corpse, looked down at it and said in an angry voice, "I will find who did this." And that was all. The most bizarre part of the story (and the part that made Elena avoid Njada for a while) was that a few days later, Elena returned to Jorvasskr to find Njada sleeping beside the corpse of Ria! Creepy, much?
Something of a misadventure happened to the adventurers in a cave filled with Falmar and Chaurus (I feel I should type Chauri here, but oh well.). Elena and Vilkas had cleared the cave and discovered the artifact and were hurrying out of the cave with their spoils. As is common in Skyrim (praise be to Julianos), a shortcut back to the cave entry appeared after Elena snatched up the artifact. The shortcut led to a ledge right beside the cave entry, and Elena quickly dropped down. She was almost out of the cave when she noticed the absence of dear hubby. She turned and saw Vilkas standing on the edge of the ledge, staring at her. She went back for him and waited. He did not move. She ordered him to "wait there" beneath the ledge. He would not move. She figured he would find his way out later, so she made her way to Breezehome, where she cooked some Apple Cabbage Stew, chatted with Lydia and concocted some Restore Health potions while she waited for her spouse to return home. Vilkas still did not return, so after selling some loot, Elena set out to recover her husband, whom she found still standing at the edge of the ledge in the cave. Afraid of heights, perhaps? She hurried down into the cave and told him to follow her back the long way, but once he reached a certain part of the path, again he would not budge. After asking him for a homemade meal (that Vilkas is always cookin') and her share of their shop's profits (was he selling merchandise to ghosts and bugs down in the cave?), Elena had to get creative. She led Vilkas back to the edge of the ledge, instructing him to wait closer and closer and closer to the ledge until--finally!--one of his feet dangled over the short drop. Then Elena, being the Dragonborn, used her Unrelenting Force shout to blast her husband off the ledge. "Damn you!" he shouted up to her. [He really did.] Elena dropped down beside him, and he changed his tone. "Good to see you again, dear," he said. "Now that's more like it," said Elena. And together, they returned to Breezehome.'
Daf Griffiths: 'Basically, when Felicia Day posted up the now famous picture of one of the inns filled with cabbages, I decided to try and do something similar. After an hour or so deciding what I could fill an inn with, I decided that, seeing as it wasn't that long ago that the fake Apple stores were closed down in China, I'd fill one with apples. Unfortunately after spawning 9000 apples in my inventory, I could only drop 4500 or so into the inn before my graphics card decided enough was enough and crashed the game. After three attempts I finally got the screenshot, posted it on Google+ and linked to it on Felicia Day's thread. It goes to show how celebrity helps when her photo has 2166 +1s to date compared to my six!'
(Go see Daf's original for more detail. I especially like the expressions. The Bard has obviously thought 'oh well!')
So that was my blog about Skyrim. Could someone tell Bethseda for an update that lets me give Bard quest items to the people that asked for them, please? I'm getting gradually overloaded with musical instruments.
On each of the 12 Blogs this year, I'm asking a creator what they're doing over the festive season. Today it's a Mr. John Scalzi, who writes...
'My reasons to enjoy the holidays this year: One, I am finally done travelling for the year and have nowhere else to be but home, with my family. That alone is reason to celebrate. Two, my daughter, whose birthday is on Christmas Eve eve, turns thirteen this year, which means she'll be an official teenager, which is of course a VERY BIG DEAL. So she'll be celebrating that particular landmark with friends and family. Three, our extended family rotates amongst itself the house upon which everyone converges for Christmas, and this year it's ours, so the place will be filled up with people and food (Krissy's family knows something about the art of stuffing an absurd amount of calories into a person). My plan for all of this is be a genial host, let other people do most of the work, stuff myself silly and drop into a food coma by the early evening. And also to reflect on the fact that the holiday season does indeed make me grateful to be with the people I love, for the sake of being with them. And then eat some more.'
And to think I took dieting advice from that man.
I hope we'll see you tomorrow for a blog I call... The Missing Christmas Episodes. Of television shows that never did them, that is. Until then... Cheerio!
So that was my blog about Skyrim. Could someone tell Bethseda for an update that lets me give Bard quest items to the people that asked for them, please? I'm getting gradually overloaded with musical instruments.
On each of the 12 Blogs this year, I'm asking a creator what they're doing over the festive season. Today it's a Mr. John Scalzi, who writes...
'My reasons to enjoy the holidays this year: One, I am finally done travelling for the year and have nowhere else to be but home, with my family. That alone is reason to celebrate. Two, my daughter, whose birthday is on Christmas Eve eve, turns thirteen this year, which means she'll be an official teenager, which is of course a VERY BIG DEAL. So she'll be celebrating that particular landmark with friends and family. Three, our extended family rotates amongst itself the house upon which everyone converges for Christmas, and this year it's ours, so the place will be filled up with people and food (Krissy's family knows something about the art of stuffing an absurd amount of calories into a person). My plan for all of this is be a genial host, let other people do most of the work, stuff myself silly and drop into a food coma by the early evening. And also to reflect on the fact that the holiday season does indeed make me grateful to be with the people I love, for the sake of being with them. And then eat some more.'
And to think I took dieting advice from that man.
I hope we'll see you tomorrow for a blog I call... The Missing Christmas Episodes. Of television shows that never did them, that is. Until then... Cheerio!
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Loved this too! I am also battling an addiction to Skyrim - if my day job was still writing soul-sucking SEO press releases I would be failing at it. Luckily I'm now paid to write fiction, and so I find it easier to resist. Phew!
Your words about carrying the game experience out into the real world with you resonated with me. On several occasions I've found myself looking at a beautiful sunset or amazing sky of freakish clouds and thinking "Wow, that's really well rendered." How sad is that?
Shame your Lydia died. I'm quite fond of mine now, I lavish her with gifts of epic armor and the like, and I like talking to her as we go through the various dungeons together. e.g "Watch where you step Lydia, there's a trap there." THOCK. "You stupid woman, what's wrong with you... Awww, you okay?"
Mad I tell you....
I haven't played Skyrim myself, but fellow gamers have reported the following:
"I've now been killed seven times by butterflies."
"...?"
"Six times looking up at them and walking off a cliff, and once tripping over a snow leopard."
lmfao throughout, causing my little one to join is, questioningly :D
Love this post!
I was just wondering if it would be alright if we used the words from the 12 days of Skyrim to actually make a song.
You can send me an email at tenfoxproductions@gmail.com
Thanks!
I thought I had encountered a talking horse, but it turned out it was a horse owned by a Noble who had been rendered as something like a mudcrab overlaid with a Noble texture. Still having nightmares.
The perk the mean you don't trigger pressure plates is no good when the Sybil of Dibella is right behind you.
I really like Skyrim. At the moment I have so many quests stacked up that I'm refusing to talk to new people until I clear a few down.
I enjoy having a follower around and I generally alternate between Lydia and Aela. I do find it a little creepy everytime I come home after an adventure with Aela that Lydia is sitting on a chair looking at my empty bed. In fact once I woke up and both Lydia and Barbus were just staring at me.
I wandered over here from a tweet by Chuck Wendig. How awesome to stumble into people who are fellow writers AND fellow Skyrim addicts. (I laughed out loud at your remarks about harvesting plants. How many times have I accidentally said, "OMG, a nirnroot!" Out loud. In real life.
And as far as reality goes... I still get a sick, puckered feeling when I'm falling, falling, falling.
They are masters of the game, no doubt.
My turn, my turn!
Like you, I had an incident I couldn't get past, and used a scroll of firestorm. Firestorm is... big and deadly. Killed the three thugs and Lydia. I felt bad, but didn't want to fight the thugs again, and looted her and went in to sell her stuff. When I came out, a courier ran up to me and said she'd left me in her will, handed me 300 gold, and ran off.
That's when I felt guilty. Also, wondered if I could get other followers and then off them too.
Currently I'm traveling with that elf dude, and he teaches me archery, and I pay him, then go into his inventory and take the gold back. He doesn't mind that, but he gets really pissed when I set him on fire accidentally, then he runs after me with his axe- the one *I* gave him. I kill him, we laugh, I reload, and we do it again.
A single dandelion repeatedly grows out of the side of our front door step, ignoring our efforts at gardening. Every time I saw this flowerless, big leafed weed my instincts would tell me "Nirnroot".
The addition of a theme tune for it in Skyrim has not helped.
Several hours into Skyrim I came across my first dragon. What the hell? I thought and proceded to fire every arrow I had into the thing. It laughed at me, I swear. Almost dead and out of arrows I quickly unequipped my bow and went running towards the dragon with (i thought) my sword in hand. Except I forgot to equip my sword so what I actually did was run up and punch it in the nose. And it died! How awesome am I that I punched my very first dragon to death?
Cheers Paul!
You mentioned the morality and ethics of the game, and I think it's one of the most interesting aspects. I have two playthroughs going for two very different purposes - one, a Khajiit cutpurse and assassin. Her only soft spot is for women in need.
The other is a Breton hero, but when I say hero, think Namor. I pushed Faendal under a bus, then took Sven on a quest and got him killed, all so that I could claim Camilla Valerius as my own. I steal when I need money, I kill when I see fit, and I do it all in the name of the greater good. I mean, I'm the mother lovin' Dragonborn! Whatever brings me honor, glory, and mirth is a fair compromise for the well being of all Skyrim, right?
Also, in reference to blurring reality and fiction... I work retail as my day job. I was in the store room the other day, and the HR came back there. In plain sight, I ducked down one of the bays and stood in shadow, thinking it all a joke. She walked past by about ten steps then said aloud to herself "Where did he go? He was just here..." I SWEAR I heard the sound of my sneak skill leveling up.
Thanks, everyone, I knew we'd get some great stories in the comments too! TenFox: that's up to Joseph Crowley. I've let him know you've asked, and he should be popping in to reply to you.
TexFox: That's certainly fine by me! I look forward to seeing what you come up with.
Great blog post, Paul. I'm still mourning the loss of my own Lydia courtesy of a double-dragon attack; an emotional journey for which the treatment seems to consist of copious amounts of more Skyrim in her honour. I'm not sure how my university work will survive if I suffer a similar bout of "grief" with the upcoming Star Wars: The Old Republic...
I too have been bitten by the Skyrim bug.
My Lydia died too... and her corpse then magically gatecrashed my wedding to Aela the Huntress.
I've travelled a similar path to you Paul, I won't steal although it's annoying when you accidentally pick something up like a book that you were just intending to read and get 5 bounty. My wife sent me on a mission to kill a beast in someone's house but they'd thoughtfully locked it despite it being broad daylight and them being outside the premises, so I had to break and enter in order to get anywhere near it. I got carted off to jail after thwacking the creature with my sword a couple of times and had to come back after filling in my paperwork.
I've abandoned a couple of Daedric quests that are truly quit nasty (and have given the flesh eating fetishists a wide berth once I sussed their game).
I generally like being a werewolf but am sad that a) I can't feast on non sentient catches like a civilised lycanthrope and b) I can't frolic through the rolling tundra with Aela in beast form at the same time. I also wish she'd send me on some more totem missions but no joy.
I'm not talking to Delphine any more she's psychotic and I prefer my scaly bro to her anyway. I thought her request was bang out of order.
Among one of my most random moments was the time I ended up fighting a dragon on a mountainside and he just decided to randomly fall halfway down it and forget he could fly. He just sort of moonwalked into the rock and buried his head like an ostrich... nice easy kill.
My most random Elder Scrolls moment ever though was in Morrowind. I had equipped myself with an item that enabled me to levitate for a ridiculous amount of time. Armed with this I headed off to the final confrontation with Dagoth Ur. I killed his first incarnation but was quite badly hurt so levitated aboth the field of battle in Ash Mountain to heal. It was at this point that my enemy decided to respawn... in mid air. Lacking the power of flight, he screamed and plummeted to the bottom of the volcano below and ended up drowning in the roiling currents of boiling magma... I never saw him again and finishing the main quest was a doddle.
I love turning pirates into bunny rabbits with Wabberjack... not so much fun when you hit a skeever with it and it becomes a Daedric Lord!
This is the sort of stuff I like to hear!
I will try not to give away too much of a particular story line with my story. In on of the towns is a murder investigation. Part of the way through, you think for a bit that you have solved it, having discovered some clues in the murderer's house. Or at least I thought I had solved it and then went on about my business. Later, when I was allowed to buy property in that town, I was sold the murderer's house, made a Thane of the Jarl there, and given a Housecarl who moved in to guard the premises. For an entirely unrelated reason, I picked up the thread of the mission later and interrupted the killer in the middle of another dastardly dead. He then proceeds to flee to his/my house. When I walk in, there is my Housecarl sitting at the dinner table (and he continues to do so during the subsequent events) when the serial killer comes running out of the bedroom and the two of us engage in a knife fight in the middle of the room. By far the most amusing event that has happened to me in the game to this point.
That's great!